As a young mom I was accused of being too helpful and I felt hurt by the statement, it came from a close friend and I felt she was being judgmental!
It happened during meal time at an event, my child was making a mess while feeding herself so I tried to take the spoon from her but she resisted and started crying.
My "accuser" then said "why are you disturbing her" let her feed herself, you should be happy she is willing to learn". She went on to state that the child is old enough to feed herself and I need to stop over pampering her.
Fast forward to present day, I am so glad I had that accuser to learn from. Shortly after my life got super busy as a full time adult student and my kids were able to do certain things for themselves and that reduced a bit of stress for that period.
Parenting is a lifetime journey and if we do not want our children depending on us for everything when they are old we need to start giving them age appropriate responsibilities early in life.
Providing help/support for children should be done in correlation with their age and keeping in mind the pace at which each child learns so our expectations are realistic.
Are you too helpful?
Link to age appropriate chores for kids: https://childdevelopmentinfo.com/chores/the-ultimate-list-of-age-appropriate-chores/